After serving in the army, I got a job in a city and met a well-known evangelist. After this meeting, I began to watch his seminar, “10 by 10.” When I heard ten questions for a sinner in this video seminar, it was as if I were convicted—it was about me! It was I who crucified Christ with my sins! I started to read Genesis and saw what a terrible sinner I was. I ran to the bathroom and stared at the mirror… Then the Holy Spirit showed me the whole depth of my sin.
Let me remind you that by that time, I have been attending church for many years. But, as it turned out, I was not born again. I felt the presence of God in my life before, and I enjoyed being in fellowship with good people in the church. But I never, I repeat, never thought how sinful I was. I knew how to pray, and I also helped in some ministries. But to be honest, I never felt 100 percent sure of salvation.
And so, I fell on my knees and began to pray to Jesus and ask for forgiveness for all the years that I was near Him, but never knew Him. Then Christ opened my eyes, and I saw how sinful I was, how perverted and depraved were all people, and all nature. Everything seemed just disgusting to me. My mind filled with awareness of what had happened in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve did not only eat the forbidden fruit and received a seemingly inadequate punishment for this. They rebelled against the Almighty God; they stopped obeying Him and wanted to become like Him! They questioned God’s Word. If you do not understand this, then the meaning of the sacrifice of Christ is lost, we begin to think that we are not so bad.
And like Adam and Eve, I rebelled against God. Concerning the ministry, I basically did what I wanted in the church, but in my heart, I rebelled and did it reluctantly. I thought that if Jesus had died for me, I also need to pay Him something back. Moreover, I promised to have a good conscience before the congregation, and I thought I was a “man of my word.” Pride, selfishness had their nest in my heart. I considered Ephesians 2:8–9: “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” There is nothing we can give Christ for our salvation. We can only obey or disobey. And worst of all, when we pretend that we followed, but in fact—we did not. That is what I have been doing all my life. All this time, I was a hypocrite, and I would hardly leave my sin, if not the Lord. Christ delivered me from slavery and lies, blindness, and death. Praise the Lord!
Now my life has completely changed. The Lord showed me what I had never seen before—how people, like the blind, fall into the same trap every time. They strive for what is temporary: money, entertainment, carnal love. And no one realizes the fact that our world is on the verge of death from the fiery wrath of God, who created heaven and earth.
After my repentance, I understood that I must tell people about it, and my feet carried me outside to share the joy of the gospel with them! And when I told the gospel to people, I felt the Holy Spirit. I got goosebumps running on my back, and I was filled with joy. Only by professing faith in front of people did I realize that I was saved. Now I am sure of it at all 200 percent! And no one will convince me that I deserve it. Now I do not want and can not stop rejoicing in Christ. His grace is wonderful! My calling is to preach God’s Word. I have dedicated my whole life to proclaiming His message to the church and the world.